This week has been one of the most physically tiring one of my life. Nausea, fatigue, and just grumpiness. Nothing seemed to ease the nausea..and I've slept most of the day since Tuesday. My treatment this week didn't go well either, I had to get extra medication to keep me from puking all over the nurses. Yuck. I really hope that this week wasn't how the rest of my treatments are going to go. The first ones went so well. It's strange just typing the word chemo gives me an up-chuck feeling in my tummy.
This morning I decided that I needed some fresh air, so I went on a walk. Despite being tired five minutes after I started walking, I'm feeling a little better. Feeling a little bit more normal.
As for what you can be praying for me about is the nausea. It's been pretty miserable the past few days.
The only thing that's really given me any comfort this week was some wise advice one of my mom's friends who is a cancer survivor gave me for when times are tough.."it'll be better tomorrow." And it's been true..tomorrow is always better.
12.30.2011
12.27.2011
I am at this very moment getting my 3rd treatment. Thanks to Santa Clause I have a brand new laptop that will actually charge! The last two weeks have been great. Despite all the stress of the holidays, Christmas was very relaxing. I loved having time with my friends and family. Last week we had to say goodbye to my sweet Grandma. I had blood work on the day of the funeral, so I wasn't able to go. My mom surprised us, and brought Grandpa back with her for Christmas!
Today my doctor let me know that my blood counts are extremely low, which explains the fatigue I have been feeling. This morning I didn't even feel like I had enough energy to get out of bed. So tomorrow I'm going to have to come back and get the shot to boost my immunity. Boo. The hair has been coming out this week. We still aren't sure if I'm going to lose it all or just thin out alot, so we haven't cut it anymore. All the hair everywhere gets annoying though. Which is why I think alot of people choose to shave it off.
Here's a little poem I found that has meant alot to me the past couple weeks. Maybe you can find some kind of encouragement in it..
"Are you living your life now as if there's no end?
Are you too quick to anger and too slow to bend?
Are your days about earning more money and fame?
Are you spending your efforts on what time shall claim?
Do you while away time when your day's work is done?
Assuming that day after day shall still come?
Do you think about life and its meaning for you?
Do you feel you've accomplished what you hoped to do?
Are you battered and bruised by life's battles and trials?
Do you seek to find refuge if just for a while?
Do the stresses of life sap your joy and strength?
Creating a life with no thought to its length?
If your answer is yes, there's a great multitude
Who are living their life with the same attitude...
Deceiving ourselves that we still have much time
To live much better in body and mind.
Just ask someone facing the end of their days
You will hear their regrets of time slipped away...
The days that were wasted-opportunities lost
Regret that it's now, that they see the great cost.
Let's begin living life now...aware it will end
Let's be slower to anger and more willing to bend
We'll be happy to know that we've given our all
And regrets will be few when we hear that great call."
-Linda Mae Richardson
Today my doctor let me know that my blood counts are extremely low, which explains the fatigue I have been feeling. This morning I didn't even feel like I had enough energy to get out of bed. So tomorrow I'm going to have to come back and get the shot to boost my immunity. Boo. The hair has been coming out this week. We still aren't sure if I'm going to lose it all or just thin out alot, so we haven't cut it anymore. All the hair everywhere gets annoying though. Which is why I think alot of people choose to shave it off.
Here's a little poem I found that has meant alot to me the past couple weeks. Maybe you can find some kind of encouragement in it..
"Are you living your life now as if there's no end?
Are you too quick to anger and too slow to bend?
Are your days about earning more money and fame?
Are you spending your efforts on what time shall claim?
Do you while away time when your day's work is done?
Assuming that day after day shall still come?
Do you think about life and its meaning for you?
Do you feel you've accomplished what you hoped to do?
Are you battered and bruised by life's battles and trials?
Do you seek to find refuge if just for a while?
Do the stresses of life sap your joy and strength?
Creating a life with no thought to its length?
If your answer is yes, there's a great multitude
Who are living their life with the same attitude...
Deceiving ourselves that we still have much time
To live much better in body and mind.
Just ask someone facing the end of their days
You will hear their regrets of time slipped away...
The days that were wasted-opportunities lost
Regret that it's now, that they see the great cost.
Let's begin living life now...aware it will end
Let's be slower to anger and more willing to bend
We'll be happy to know that we've given our all
And regrets will be few when we hear that great call."
-Linda Mae Richardson
12.15.2011
Two down...six to go!
"Ive heard there are troubles of more than one kind. Some come from ahead and some come from behind. But I've got a big bat. I'm all ready you see. Now my troubles are going to have troubles with me." -Dr. Seuss
I'm officially 1/4 of the way done with my treatments! Woo hoo! I'd have to say this treatment was a little more difficult than my first. A lot more fatigue and a lot more nausea. And just this morning the mouth sores started that I was warned about. Eeeek.
A day after treatment most chemo patients go in to get a Neulasta shot. The purpose of this shot is to boost your immunity, which is very helpful and necessary for someone who has the immunity of dirt. However, the side effects of this shot...suck. Bone pain is the first side effect you notice. I have a little more sympathy for those who have arthritis now. Everything aches...even your teeth. But..the good news is when I met with my doctor before my treatment this week my counts were all so good he said I didn't need the shot this time around! Thank God! So no old lady syndrome for Molly!
I feel like I'm still almost in a state of unbelief that I really have cancer...mostly because alot of the time I feel normal. This last weekend I ran two miles (almost) as easily as I did three months ago. It's strange to know that there is essentially poison running through my veins and cancer cells sitting in my body, and I'm not laying around bedridden and sick. I'm not gonna lie, somedays are harder than others. Sometimes, cancer is more of an emotional game then it is a physical. Sometimes, the struggle to get out of bed has nothing to do with feeling sick. But, I've come to realize I got lots of things to do in this life, and laying around feeling sorry for myself certainly isn't one of them.
I cannot even begin to express how grateful I am for my family and friends. Everyday I get a letter or card from somebody with some kind of encouragement. I am sometimes overwhelmed by how many people I have thinking about me and praying for me daily. It kind of made me wonder why it takes something like cancer to make you tell someone how much you love and care about them. I am more guilty of this than anybody. Take the time to tell someone that you love them today. You can't help but feel happy when you hear it, or when you say it. And somedays for me, it makes all the difference in the world. I call that Cancer Lesson #1.
I'm officially 1/4 of the way done with my treatments! Woo hoo! I'd have to say this treatment was a little more difficult than my first. A lot more fatigue and a lot more nausea. And just this morning the mouth sores started that I was warned about. Eeeek.
A day after treatment most chemo patients go in to get a Neulasta shot. The purpose of this shot is to boost your immunity, which is very helpful and necessary for someone who has the immunity of dirt. However, the side effects of this shot...suck. Bone pain is the first side effect you notice. I have a little more sympathy for those who have arthritis now. Everything aches...even your teeth. But..the good news is when I met with my doctor before my treatment this week my counts were all so good he said I didn't need the shot this time around! Thank God! So no old lady syndrome for Molly!
I feel like I'm still almost in a state of unbelief that I really have cancer...mostly because alot of the time I feel normal. This last weekend I ran two miles (almost) as easily as I did three months ago. It's strange to know that there is essentially poison running through my veins and cancer cells sitting in my body, and I'm not laying around bedridden and sick. I'm not gonna lie, somedays are harder than others. Sometimes, cancer is more of an emotional game then it is a physical. Sometimes, the struggle to get out of bed has nothing to do with feeling sick. But, I've come to realize I got lots of things to do in this life, and laying around feeling sorry for myself certainly isn't one of them.
I cannot even begin to express how grateful I am for my family and friends. Everyday I get a letter or card from somebody with some kind of encouragement. I am sometimes overwhelmed by how many people I have thinking about me and praying for me daily. It kind of made me wonder why it takes something like cancer to make you tell someone how much you love and care about them. I am more guilty of this than anybody. Take the time to tell someone that you love them today. You can't help but feel happy when you hear it, or when you say it. And somedays for me, it makes all the difference in the world. I call that Cancer Lesson #1.
12.09.2011
You have cancer....say what!?
"When you think about it, what other choice is there but to hope? We have two options, medically and emotionally: give up, or Fight Like Hell.” -Lance Armstrong
I consider myself to be a pretty typical college student. My world revolved around school, work, family, friends, and beer. A lump was noticed in my neck that concerned my family Doctor, so he sent me to a specialist who removed my lymph node to test what was going on. Needless to say my world was rocked on November 8th 2011 when my Doctor called to let me know that my lymph node biopsy came back showing I have Hodgkins Lymphoma.
Being 23 years old and faced with the word "cancer" is one of the scariest things that can happen. I immediately saw images of bald, skeletal, malnourished people in my head. Am I going to die? Will I ever get married? Or have kids? All the things in life that a 23 year old shouldn't have to be questioning.
I was set up with my new best friend..my Oncologist, Dr. Reddy. The journey to finding the perfect Oncologist was a short one. Within one minute of being in the room with my Doctor, I knew he was the perfect match for me...the first words out of his mouth were...
"This is curable, Molly. And we're going to beat this." (In his Indian accent, where "Molly" actually sounds like "Holly"...but I ignored that part and assumed he was talking to me.)
Within the first week of being diagnosed I had to have:
1. Bone Marrow Biopsy
2. Portacath put into my chest for my chemo treatments
3. Heart and Lung tests to make sure I'm all healthy there
4. A PET scan to see what areas of my body are affected by the cancer
After allllll of this...the bone marrow showed that the cancer had not yet reached my bones (yay!), and the PET scan showed it hadn't reached my organs (double yay!). So that put me at Stage 2. Which equals 4 months of Chemotherapy.
So. If you know me at all, you know my hair is my baby. My pride and joy. So, obviously, my first question was.."Am I going to lose my hair?!"
The chemo treatment I'm doing is called ABVD. Every other Monday until March I go and get my chemo on. I have only had one treatment so far. And I still have all of my hair..so far. Within the next week is when all of my nurses have predicted its going to go. So pray for me about that, I got a new short hair cut to make things a little easier. But, it's still going to be really difficult for me.
This post was really just a boring update to all of those who don't really know what's been going on with me. I'm not one to go on Facebook and say "I have cancer." or call you and say "Hey what's up. I got cancer." That's a lil awkward.
You can expect the rest of my posts to contain more in depth info about yours truly and how things are going, this was really me just playing catchup. I've found nothing has ever made me question life, God, love, family, friends, and everything else more than I have the past month. If this is the first time you've heard that I have cancer, guess what...
Don't worry. I got this!
I consider myself to be a pretty typical college student. My world revolved around school, work, family, friends, and beer. A lump was noticed in my neck that concerned my family Doctor, so he sent me to a specialist who removed my lymph node to test what was going on. Needless to say my world was rocked on November 8th 2011 when my Doctor called to let me know that my lymph node biopsy came back showing I have Hodgkins Lymphoma.
Being 23 years old and faced with the word "cancer" is one of the scariest things that can happen. I immediately saw images of bald, skeletal, malnourished people in my head. Am I going to die? Will I ever get married? Or have kids? All the things in life that a 23 year old shouldn't have to be questioning.
I was set up with my new best friend..my Oncologist, Dr. Reddy. The journey to finding the perfect Oncologist was a short one. Within one minute of being in the room with my Doctor, I knew he was the perfect match for me...the first words out of his mouth were...
"This is curable, Molly. And we're going to beat this." (In his Indian accent, where "Molly" actually sounds like "Holly"...but I ignored that part and assumed he was talking to me.)
Within the first week of being diagnosed I had to have:
1. Bone Marrow Biopsy
2. Portacath put into my chest for my chemo treatments
3. Heart and Lung tests to make sure I'm all healthy there
4. A PET scan to see what areas of my body are affected by the cancer
After allllll of this...the bone marrow showed that the cancer had not yet reached my bones (yay!), and the PET scan showed it hadn't reached my organs (double yay!). So that put me at Stage 2. Which equals 4 months of Chemotherapy.
So. If you know me at all, you know my hair is my baby. My pride and joy. So, obviously, my first question was.."Am I going to lose my hair?!"
The chemo treatment I'm doing is called ABVD. Every other Monday until March I go and get my chemo on. I have only had one treatment so far. And I still have all of my hair..so far. Within the next week is when all of my nurses have predicted its going to go. So pray for me about that, I got a new short hair cut to make things a little easier. But, it's still going to be really difficult for me.
This post was really just a boring update to all of those who don't really know what's been going on with me. I'm not one to go on Facebook and say "I have cancer." or call you and say "Hey what's up. I got cancer." That's a lil awkward.
You can expect the rest of my posts to contain more in depth info about yours truly and how things are going, this was really me just playing catchup. I've found nothing has ever made me question life, God, love, family, friends, and everything else more than I have the past month. If this is the first time you've heard that I have cancer, guess what...
Don't worry. I got this!
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